Metal – Scientifically Nicer Than Indie

I’ve had an epiphany.

Has it got this bad?

Actually that implies I have just realised something, when in fact I have kind of known all along. I just happen to have an outlet for it these days.

I’m pretty into my music. Both of us (me and Number One) in fact are. I generally gravitate towards people who are, I think. But the kicker is I don’t necessarily gravitate towards people who listen to whatever music I listen to. In fact, very few people I spend any time with listen to most of the music I listen to. Now, I like a lot of different music, a pretty vast range, but if push comes to shove I say I listen to heavy metal. Or if I am feeling like being a bit of a twat, I say post-metal (which is actually more accurate (in some circles at least), though I have on at least two occasions said ‘metal for astronauts‘, but now we’re splitting hairs). This usually ends most conversations about music with an arched eyebrow and a swift change of topic, or someone blithely stating that they hate metal (my lovely and wonderful girlfriend included). And this is the crux of what pisses me off really. You have no idea what kind of music I listen to if you say you don’t like ‘that kind of music’. I am ridiculously surprised every time I happen to come across people who are into the same kind of music, let alone heard of bands I drool over. I say I listen to heavy metal because I have little interest in sounding like a pretentious hipster that gets off on listening to obscure music that literally no one has ever heard of and seemingly proud of it. I am not that person. That person needs their face smashed in.

Throw the horns...

I feel I have to defend my taste, not because it is my particular taste, but it is one of those things that is so commonly misunderstood. A musician I am rather fond of once said “metal in general has long been unjustly maligned as solely the province of knuckle-dragging meatheads”. I can’t think of a better way to describe the look on people’s faces when I say I like metal. I like heavy, breathtaking music. I go to sleep listening to it. No it’s not depressing, no it’s not just noise, and it really doesn’t invoke images of Satan, you muppet (well, not strictly speaking…).

Anyway. That was a really long introduction into my actual point.

About 3 years ago the BBC did an article on some research done by Heriot-Watt University about music tastes and personality. Now I generally dislike indie music, not because I think the music is terrible, I like some of it (shock/horror), but most of it, to me, is fucking boring. And most of all, really fucking depressing. I can sit quietly in my room with my headphones on full blast (as I am doing now – Cult of Luna’s ‘Waiting for You’ from Salvationcheck it out: 5 quiet minutes, 6 heavy minutes, one minute of lyrics, a fucktonne of auditory awe), and not once fall into a depressive stupor that seems to be the typical market stall of the indie genre. It, indie, may sound happy (sometimes), but it’s clever in its subversive depression (not in the good way). Which I think is even more depressing. But my reasoning for referencing that piece of research is what it has to say about the kinds of people who listen to a couple of genres. I do acknowledge, somewhat begrudgingly, the lack of real depth in the genres that are given, but hey ho, they mostly work in my favour so boo-hoo for you if you don’t like witches’ brew. But if you see this bit, and its little bit on indie music, you can’t help but laugh: Low self-esteem, creative, not hard-working, not gentle. Ok. So the first three are really obvious. Sort of. The music is so fucking whiny you can safely assume it appeals to people with low self-esteem (it says the same thing about metal, which in some (dreaded) sub-genres of metal I’m afraid they’re right). But the gentle thing is what I find interesting.

The irony may or may not be lost

What with the whole weak, sickly looking look, you would think they were kind of gentle. But then I thought about it and it’s actually really fucking passive-aggressive. And come on, if there is clique that is typified by that, well the whole ‘I’m so cool because I like music no one has ever heard of’ thing is right up that line of reasoning. You could imagine them all being highly strung with all that. Which leads me on to people into metal: Low self-esteem, creative, not hard-working, not outgoing, at ease. Now, I think metal is often just as introspective as indie music (we’ll skip the 80s metal scene, it makes me weep for the most part, because most people think of hair-metal as 80s metal, when it was so much more than that – if you’re interested in the genealogy of it, go here, though this is not by any means complete; most of the music I listen to isn’t even on it… I’m that scene…).

Could you trust these people?

So the not outgoing thing makes sense. Low-self esteem and not outgoing, they go hand in hand. Low self-esteem and not gentle? Well, usually those people aren’t very nice. Cunts, in fact. But what is downright fascinating in a sense is the ‘at ease’ bit, that metal kids have and indie kids don’t. Which explains the whole obsessive thing with indie kids and their on going battle in one-upmanship. Because they’re not at ease, and never seem to be. They must constantly reassert themselves in social group constantly doing the same thing, and attempting to be some strange and weird top (bottom?) dog.

Explains a whole fucking lot if you ask me.

In sum: next time you hug a metal kid, well, they’re actually less likely to shiv you than an indie kid…

Think about that.

Comments
2 Responses to “Metal – Scientifically Nicer Than Indie”
  1. Angry Man Number One says:

    You twat. How am I supposed to top that?

  2. Indie makes me wish I was deaf. Especially that wishy-washy “let’s all be friends” ubiquitous fucking shite that assaults my ears daily. I don’t WANT to be friends.

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